My parents are Christians and sought to raise my sisters and I up in the Lord. I learned many things from them and felt they were the same at home as they were at church. I did NOT see hypocrisy in the way they lived. Because of that and many other reasons, I felt like I saw 'the faith' work for them and knew it could also 'work' for me. Unfortunately, many have a very different experience. Either Jesus was nowhere in the picture, or their parents put on a smile at church and acted differently at home, teaching their children that 'church/God/faith' really doesn't work and that it is just a game we play. Some of these youth play the same game and then leave church when they go off to college. Because the youth never had a true faith themselves and never saw it 'work' they were ready to move on. I not only had godly examples as parents but had other adults pouring into my life as well. Richard Ross, the co-founder of True Love Waits and guru in youth ministry, once said it takes 5 adults outside a child's parents for that child to properly mature (especially spiritually). I sure can see that in my life! I can truly say I lived among a Christian community where many adults poured into my life. I know discipleship/mentoring is a foreign concept for many because they have never seen it done, don't feel they have time, and I guess either consciously or ignorantly don't feel that those verses in the Bible are meant to be obeyed. Just so we are on the same page...here are a few...
"Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age." Matthew 28:19-20 ESV
"So even to old age and gray hairs, O God, do not forsake me, until I proclaim your might to another generation, your power to all those to come." Psalm 71:18 ESV
"Give ear, O my people, to my teaching;
incline your ears to the words of my mouth!
I will open my mouth in a parable;
I will utter dark sayings from of old,
things that we have heard and known,
that our fathers have told us.
We will not hide them from their children,
but tell to the coming generation
the glorious deeds of the LORD, and his might,
and the wonders that he has done.
He established a testimony in Jacob
and appointed a law in Israel,
which he commanded our fathers
to teach to their children,
that the next generation might know them,
the children yet unborn,
and arise and tell them to their children,
so that they should set their hope in God
and not forget the works of God,
but keep his commandments;
and that they should not be like their fathers,
a stubborn and rebellious generation,
a generation whose heart was not steadfast,
whose spirit was not faithful to God." Psalm 78:1-8 ESV
"Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled." Titus 2:3-5 ESV
"and what you have heard from me in the presence of many witnesses entrust to faithful men who will be able to teach others also." 2 Timothy 2:2 ESV
We are definitely commanded to make disciples, train, teach, etc. So let's do it! The Bible doesn't tell this only to those who have time to disciple or only to those who have gone to seminary, but we are all called to this important mission. Obviously we are all in different seasons of life, have different jobs, schedules, and are in different spots in our spiritual walk. Discipleship/mentoring may look slightly different to different people.
I had a great mentor growing up. She was/is a pastor's wife, speaker, and mother of 3. She was/is a very busy woman. She influenced so many people and still continues to pour into lives all around her through her speaking and living her life for Christ. Her love for Christ overflows, you can't help but smile around her and desire to be in her presence again. She has truly taken on the character of Christ! She is compassionate, loving, joyful, gracious, giving, faithful, kind, obedient, a servant, a teacher, a mentor, a guide, a leader, and very zealous for the Lord. I was so blessed as a high school student to be with her a lot. She mentored me in so many ways. Because she loves the Lord so well, it overflowed to me. I wanted to know Christ more and have that love and joy in my life. Because of her, I desired to read the Word and worship the Lord in all I did. Although I did attend some of the classes she taught in church or other times, we didn't set out to do a Bible study one-on-one. I think that is one of the misconceptions of discipleship--that you just have to sit down and study the Bible. That is not the whole of discipleship. Yes, we are to strive to be in the Word and we must center everything we do around it and encourage one another in it, but we don't always need to add another study in our life. For some who are not involved in a church or Bible study, that may be a good part of your time spent together. But for others it may just be doing life together. Beverly and I just did life together. Like I said, she was a busy woman but still made the time to take me under her wing. We never called it discipleship and I didn't specifically ask her to spend time with me, but thankfully it worked out that way. I saw how she acted at church, how she spoke and counseled people, how she was excited about going to church, reading the Word, and pursuing Scripture memory. I helped her cook dinner, I saw how she talked to and respected her husband, how she treated her kids, how she served others, how she wasn't lazy or selfish with her time, how she handled herself when she felt she failed at something, how she always had a worship song for the Lord in her heart, how she brought Scripture memory to mind in a situation...really just how she spent her life for the Lord. She would have been doing those things whether I was there or not but she blessed me by allowing me to be there to see how a love for the Lord changes every aspect of your life. And now that I am a pastor's wife, I can see what a blessing that was in my training. To see how a pastor's wife supports her husband and that pastors and their families are still human, not perfect, but still real. Like I said, my parents are godly examples, but I am not going to lie...I was a teenager once and that is a point in your (or at least my) life where your parents just are not cool. They never changed, I just had that teenage prideful, independent attitude. They were not necessarily the first person I ran to for advice or the like at that stage in life. I have learned a great deal of what it means to be a godly woman, have a godly marriage, and be a godly parent from my parents but can see the need and desire I had at that time to have someone outside my parents to disciple and mentor me. There were other people outside my parents who also invested in me but Beverly was a huge example of what it means to be a godly woman at an important time in my life.
Even though I am so busy at this time in my life discipling my own children, I can still invest in others' lives. So I encourage you to as well. Bring someone along to study the Word with and/or just walk through life together. It is such a blessing to all those involved, and it IS commanded after all...
If you would like a good read on this topic, check out this blog post: As Iron Sharpens Iron
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